The Spider

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It was 4 o’clock Sunday morning. I was sitting at my computer chatting to a friend, just about to head off to bed. He’d just said “I pulled out the folder with all the records in it this morning, and a honkin’ great spider crawled out,” when I looked to my left and less than a foot from my head was The Spider. I grabbed my camera to take a photo, but the battery went flat after the first flash, and by the time I’d changed batteries, The Spider had run behind my computer. It then swung down my phone lead, jumped onto the floor, and ran towards my feet. I don’t normally mind spiders. When they stick to doing spider-like things, such as crawling, I find them reasonably harmless and not too scary. But spiders oughtn’t to swing down phone leads, jump, and run – they’re supposed to just crawl. I ran and got my torch so I could take photos of it in the dark, but when I got back, I couldn’t find it. I shone the torch around looking, and finally found it – less than a foot from my foot! The Spider then ran towards my bed, so I ran and got a broom to head it off, but by the time I got back it had jumped onto the side of my bed. I fought with it, via the broom, but it won – hiding in behind my bed. I had to drag the bed away from the wall and fight it with the broom again. I eventually got it behind the door, and went back to tell my friends online the good news. When I got back to have another look, The Spider had once again disappeared. I found it running down the hallway at high speed, just before it vanished into another room, where I suspect it still is.

Spiders are okay, but large spiders within jumping distance of my head, or hiding in the dark where I put my feet, or hidden away in my bed, aren’t okay. They’re even worse at 4 AM directly after talking about spiders.

The Spider.

The Spider behind my computer, giving some idea of its size.

The Spider behind my computer, again, giving some idea of its size once its relative distance from the computer is taken into account.

The Spider baring fangs before running towards my foot at an incredibly fast pace.

Spider attacking the broom with which I was attacking it.

Spider escaping up the hallway at high speed – once again showing its size (the timber up the wall is normal full-size tongue-and-groove).

LATEST VERSION OF THIS PAGE AVAILABLE AT http://the-i.org/pic_fauna/21

26-Sep-2004 04:00