“I do so by asking them the right question,” says the Queen. “Allow me to demonstrate.” She phones Tony Blair and says, “Mr. Prime Minister. Please answer this question: ‘Your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?’”
Tony Blair responds, “It’s me, ma’am.”
“Correct. Thank you and goodbye, sir,” says the Queen. She hangs up and says, “Did you get that, Mr. Bush?” “Yes ma’am. Thanks a lot. I’ll definitely be using that technique in the future!”
Upon returning to Washington, he decides he’d better put the Chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee to the test. He summons Jesse Helms. “I wonder if you can answer a question for me.”
“Why, of course, sir. What’s on your mind?” says Jesse.
“Uhh, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?”
Helms hems and haws and finally asks, “Can I think about it and get back to you Sir?”
Bush agrees, and Helms leaves. Helms immediately call a meeting of other senior Republican senators, and they puzzle over the question for several hours, but nobody can come up with an answer.
Finally, in desperation, Helms calls Colin Powell at the State Department and explains his problem. “Now look here, son, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?”
Powell answers immediately, “It’s me of course, you idiot.”
Much relieved, Helms rushes back to the White House and exclaims, “I know the answer, sir! I know who it is! It’s Colin Powell!”
And Bush replies in disgust, “You’re wrong, you idiot. It’s Tony Blair!”
See also: The cow theory of government (Cow Theory)