I take no reponsibility for any of these:
We've been playing around with our Unix shells here,
and have come up with a few gems. Note that the '%' prompt
indicates the C shell, while the '$' prompt indicates the
Bourne shell. Go ahead and try some.
% scan for <<"Arnold Schwarzenegger"
"Arnold Schwarzenegger": << terminator not found
% ar m God
ar: God does not exist
% "How would you rate Quayle's incompetence?
Unmatched".
% ^How did the sex change^operation go?
Modifier failed.
% If I had a ( for every $ the Congress spent, what would I have?
Too many ('s.
% make love
Make: Don't know how to make love. Stop.
% sleep with me
bad character
% got a light?
No match.
% man: why did you get a divorce?
man:: Too many arguments.
% ^What is saccharine?
Bad substitute.
% %blow
%blow: No such job.
% cat 'the can of tuna'
cat: cannot open the can of tuna
$ mkdir matter; cat>matter
matter: cannot create
$ PATH=pretending! /usr/ucb/which sense
no sense in pretending!
$ drink <bottle; opener
bottle: cannot open
opener: not found